Increasing Willingness to Miss Out

Freya India has noticed that people are increasing afraid to participate in real life. Over the past decade, I have also personally noticed this change in both teenagers and adults. Here's an excerpt from India's article:

When talking about the harms of social media today, one of the first problems people mention is FOMO—fear of missing out. Scroll through Instagram and see your friends having fun at a party you weren’t invited to. Check Snapchat to find everyone’s Bitmojis together on Snap Map without you. This feeling of constantly missing out, we’re told, is a major cause of anxiety and depression for Gen Z.

But I don’t believe that’s true anymore.

More often, I see the opposite. Social media doesn’t make Gen Z afraid to miss out; it makes us want to miss out. We want to avoid the risk, the rejection, the awkwardness, the effort and energy that the real world demands. Our major problem isn’t fear of missing out. It’s fear of taking part.

Look at how many young people are scared of doing everyday things. I don’t just mean fear of learning to drive, or getting a job—I mean scared to order in restaurants. Can’t walk into a cafe. Don’t want to open their door for a delivery. Under the hashtag #socialanxiety on TikTok, which has nearly 3 billion views, young people are sharing symptoms, describing debilitating anxiety, even recording their panic attacks in public. One British TikToker hosts a series called “Doing Things You’re Afraid of To Show You It’s Okay”, where she films herself facing challenges like getting in an elevator, asking for help in a supermarket, and asking for directions.

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Video Synopsis of Jonathan Haidt’s Newest Book: “The Anxious Generation”

Jonathan Haidt's newest book, The Anxious Generation, is out. I bought a copy but haven't read it (though I've watched several interview of Haidt and he makes a compelling case). The statistics are sobering:

Here's a 7-minute video synopsis of Haidt's book to whet your appetite:

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The Importance of Unstructured Play for Children

2023 study:

Our thesis is that a primary cause of the rise in mental disorders is a decline over decades in opportunities for children and teens to play, roam, and engage in other activities independent of direct oversight and control by adults.

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