About Anxiety

Today I watched this video by comedian Bill Hader. The topic, struggling with anxiety, is a serious--sometimes debilitating--topic, but, as one would expect, Hader deals with it in a serious way. I know more than a few people who are imprisoned by their anxious thoughts. They are often letting life pass them by, which is tragic.

I don't think I struggle more than most people with anxiety, but I know I can sometimes have anxious thoughts and these sometimes interfere with my ability to do my job (trial attorney) and deal with the other challenges of living life, which are, of course, ubiquitous. Lucky for me, I have never felt the need to take any medications. But I am always on the lookout for ways to tamp down those pesky and distracting anxious feelings.

I think Bill's approach is a good one. He reframes his anxiety as a thing separate from him. His anxiety is a thing that he does not need to accept as a part of himself.

In this clip, Abigail Shrier points out potential environmental causes for anxiety in children. Interesting finding that I find unsurprising for the reasons she suggests. Lack of limits and rules (i.e., too much freedom) can be disorienting. I think we need foundational axiom in order to make sense of the world. They might not be perfect, but we need base assumptions of some sort or we become unanchored. We can't reason at all without at least some anchors:  It's the same thing with geometry, as Bertrand Russell discussed:

Before I began the study of geometry somebody had told me that it proved things and this caused me to feel delight when my brother said he would teach it to me. Geometry in those days was still 'Euclid'. My brother began at the beginning with the definitions. These I accepted readily enough. But he came next to the axioms. 'These', he said, 'can't be proved, but they have to be assumed before the rest can be proved.' At these words my hopes crumbled. I had thought it would be wonderful to find something that one could PROVE, and then it turned out that this could only be done by means of assumptions of which there was no proof. I looked at my brother with a sort of indignation and said: 'But why should I admit these things if they can't be proved?' He replied: 'Well, if you won't, we can't go on.' I thought it might be worth while to learn the rest of the story, so I agreed to admit the axioms for the time being. But I remained full of doubt and perplexity as regards a region in which I had hoped to find indisputable clarity. In spite of these doubts, which at most times I forgot, and which I usually supposed capable of some answer not yet known to me, I found great delight in mathematics-much more delight, in fact, than in any other study.

From Basic Writings of Bertrand Russell, "Why I took to Philosophy," p. 57.

In this clip, Shrier mentions research showing "Boys in liberal families have higher anxiety than girls in conservative families."

In her book, Shrier states that obsessing about your inner depression and anxiety make those problems grow in you mind.

I have read excerpts from Shrier's book and heard several of her interviews. I asked Grok to summarize Shrier's main points on this topic and it did a great job:

In her book Bad Therapy: Why the Kids Aren’t Growing Up (published February 2024), Abigail Shrier argues that young adults who obsess over their mental health, particularly Generation Z (born 1997–2012), may worsen their condition due to a culture that overemphasizes therapy and emotional self-focus. Her key points on this issue, based on her investigation and interviews with psychologists, parents, teachers, and young people, include:

1. Encouraging Rumination: Shrier contends that excessive focus on feelings—encouraged by therapists, schools, and parenting trends like “gentle parenting”—leads young adults to ruminate on their anxieties and sadness. This rumination can trap them in cycles of depression and anxiety, as they dwell on perceived traumas or minor emotional setbacks instead of moving forward. For example, she cites therapy practices that prompt young people to constantly explore “what might be wrong,” which can amplify distress rather than resolve it.

2. Pathologizing Normal Emotions: Shrier argues that the mental health industry and societal trends label normal challenges of adolescence and young adulthood (e.g., sadness, stress, or social struggles) as mental health disorders. This overdiagnosis convinces young adults they are inherently fragile or damaged, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy where they expect to need professional help to cope. She notes that 42% of Gen Z have a formal mental health diagnosis, yet their mental health is worse than previous generations, suggesting overtreatment may harm rather than help.

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Andrew Huberman Discusses How to Get to Flow

Interesting post based on Andrew Huberman's discussion. First, what is flow? From Grok:

The concept of "flow" in the context of psychology was developed by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. He introduced this idea in his seminal work, where he described flow as a state of complete immersion and optimal experience in an activity. Csikszentmihalyi's research focused on how people could achieve happiness through engaging in activities that challenge their skills just enough to keep them absorbed and intrinsically motivated.

But how does one get to the flow state. Huberman cautions that even though the state of flow can be blissful, getting to flow can be a struggle. On X, Billy Oppenheimer summarizes Huberman's discussion:

I think about this twice a day.

Every morning when I sit down to read & again when I begin to work, I say to myself,

“Accept the initial agitation.”

When you try to focus, Andrew Huberman explains, “the brain circuits that turn on first are of the stress system.”

Meaning:

“The agitation and stress that you feel at the beginning of something—when you’re trying to lean into it and you can’t focus: you feel agitated and your mind’s jumping all over the place—that is just a gate. You have to pass through that gate to get to the focus component.”

There’s a common misconception, @hubermanlab continues: “the misunderstanding around how these brain circuits work has led to this idea...a kind of obsession with the idea that we have to feel good in order to be productive.”

“And nothing could be further from the truth.”

The truth is it’s the reverse: we have to be productive—we have to start working, we have to lean in and get going, accepting the initial agitation—in order to feel good.

So along with “accept the initial agitation,” sometimes—when I don’t feel especially good, motivated, interested, or energized—I say to myself,

“Forget how you feel right now.”

“It will feel good,” Huberman says, “but there’s a whole staircase in which it feels kind of lousy...The early stages of hard work and focus are always going to feels like agitation, stress, and confusion.”

“Remember: there’s a gate of entry. You have to wade through some sewage before you can swim in clear water. That’s the way I always think about it.”

Continue ReadingAndrew Huberman Discusses How to Get to Flow

Increasing Willingness to Miss Out

Freya India has noticed that people are increasing afraid to participate in real life. Over the past decade, I have also personally noticed this change in both teenagers and adults. Here's an excerpt from India's article:

When talking about the harms of social media today, one of the first problems people mention is FOMO—fear of missing out. Scroll through Instagram and see your friends having fun at a party you weren’t invited to. Check Snapchat to find everyone’s Bitmojis together on Snap Map without you. This feeling of constantly missing out, we’re told, is a major cause of anxiety and depression for Gen Z.

But I don’t believe that’s true anymore.

More often, I see the opposite. Social media doesn’t make Gen Z afraid to miss out; it makes us want to miss out. We want to avoid the risk, the rejection, the awkwardness, the effort and energy that the real world demands. Our major problem isn’t fear of missing out. It’s fear of taking part.

Look at how many young people are scared of doing everyday things. I don’t just mean fear of learning to drive, or getting a job—I mean scared to order in restaurants. Can’t walk into a cafe. Don’t want to open their door for a delivery. Under the hashtag #socialanxiety on TikTok, which has nearly 3 billion views, young people are sharing symptoms, describing debilitating anxiety, even recording their panic attacks in public. One British TikToker hosts a series called “Doing Things You’re Afraid of To Show You It’s Okay”, where she films herself facing challenges like getting in an elevator, asking for help in a supermarket, and asking for directions.

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Video Synopsis of Jonathan Haidt’s Newest Book: “The Anxious Generation”

Jonathan Haidt's newest book, The Anxious Generation, is out. I bought a copy but haven't read it (though I've watched several interview of Haidt and he makes a compelling case). The statistics are sobering:

Here's a 7-minute video synopsis of Haidt's book to whet your appetite:

Continue ReadingVideo Synopsis of Jonathan Haidt’s Newest Book: “The Anxious Generation”