This Just In: Hannah Montana May Have A Clitoris!

What are we to make of this latest flap over a teen icon revealing herself as a potentially sexual being?

I was only dimly aware of Hannah Montana till the Vanity Fair scandal (if scandal is the word). Now it seems I can’t get away from her, which is, of course, the goal of marketing—to make something inescapable for the general public. There are elements of the incident that require less froth and more examination. The accusations of “whose idea was it in the first place and how was Mylie Cyrus manipulated?” are loud and in many ways naive.

First off, Hannah Montana is a Disney product. I don’t think we’re yet quite comfortable with the idea of a person—even a fictional one—being a “product” like a box of soap or a car, but this is indeed what the character is. Designed, engineered, and road tested, Hannah Montana is a money-making machine for Disney and the various participants in the show and franchise.

Pause for a moment and consider: Disney.

It is difficult to imagine a marketing machine that is better at what it does. Which means the chances of something being done with one of its properties that it (a) doesn’t know about and (b) doesn’t approve are next to zero. Especially when you add to that:

Vanity Fair.

Big magazine, famous magazine, a magazine people in show business lust to get into. In the vernacular, Lot A Bank there.

So we’re talking about two major corporate entities, …

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The Journey: an outsider attends a different kind of church

People have all kinds of hobbies.  Some people like to knit.  Other people like to collect stamps.  I like to go to church while playing the role of “anthropologist.”

When I am thinking about visiting a church, my biggest decision is deciding what church to visit.  That was my decision three days ago. I had already been to a stern and humorless evangelical church.  The thing I remembered about that church was the scriptural quotation featured on the T-shirts of hundreds of the people attending: “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge.”  It was a quote from Proverbs 1:7.  I remember thinking “Of all the quotes they could’ve chosen from the Bible, this one is strange indeed.  Any good teacher knows that the best students are driven by natural curiosity and a good dose of skepticism, not by fear.”

Back to my task of choosing a church.  Last week, I just happened to be in the car listening to a fundamentalist A.M. radio station when I heard neocon talk show host Paul McGuire ranting about a new crop of churches designed for young people, churches that allegedly don’t spend enough time on the Bible but, instead, cater to the social needs of the congregation.  Maguire’s rant went on for several minutes, long enough for me to conclude that I simply had to go to one of these new hip churches to see for myself.

As it turns out, one of those new “emerging” churches is located about …

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