The Death of Romance?

What's going on with romance?

Earlier this year (2021), the Pew Research Center asked a representative sample of adults “What about your life do you currently find meaningful, fulfilling or satisfying? What keeps you going and why?”

Psychology Today summarizes the responses related to romance:

In 2017, 20 percent of adults in the U.S. mentioned a spouse, romantic partner, marriage, dating, or romantic love as a source of meaning, fulfillment, or satisfaction. By 2021, only 9 percent did so. Of the 16 sources of meaning and fulfillment that participants mentioned, none showed a sharper drop over time. (The decrease was the same for the category of material well-being.) . . .

The 9 percent who found fulfillment in romantic partners in the U.S., though, was the highest percentage of all the places studied, . . . In France, Greece, and Spain, only 3 percent mentioned a spouse, romantic partner, marriage, dating, or romantic love as a source of meaning, fulfillment, or satisfaction. In Japan and Singapore, only 2 percent did. And in South Korea and Taiwan, a mere 1 percent mentioned any sort of romantic theme.

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Mending Fences, Part II – My Concern with Anti-Religious Atheism

[Note: This is Part II of a series of posts being the title "Mending Fences"] When Sam Harris, Richard Dawkins and the other “new atheists” first launched their attacks on religion a few years ago, I was delighted. After decades of relative silence, the mass media was finally giving some atheists a chance to present my view that virgins don’t have babies and that dead people don’t regain consciousness. Harris, Dawkins and other new atheists dared to argue in public that there is no sentient version of God; they reminded believers that all believers were atheists regarding Zeus, as well as all of the purported gods other than their own God. The writings of the new atheists energized considerable discussion, much of it thoughtful. Even a cursory review of the many websites and YouTube videos considering religion makes it clear that many teenagers and young adults have actively joined discussions triggered by the new atheists. In the wake of this energized discussion, many of us became proficient at pointing out the hundreds of contradictions and absurdities in the Bible. We repeatedly called foul whenever we spotted theists cherry-picking the Bible (none of you are wearing clothes made of linen and wool, I hope!). We repeatedly reminded believers of Carl Sagan’s caveat that extraordinary claims require extraordinary proof. Many of us dug even deeper, studying the philosophy of science, so that we could clearly explain to believers that to be meaningful, claims had to be falsifiable. Not that these arguments actually convinced believers (at least, not in my personal experience), but they did serve to announce our view that religious claims must no longer be privileged—they shouldn’t be assumed to be true and that they must be put under the microscope (as Daniel Dennett urged in Breaking the Spell) like every other natural phenomenon. We made it clear that we weren’t convinced when believers attempted to explain their beliefs by reference to ancient apocryphal supposedly-sacred writings strewn with ambiguity and self-contradictions. Thanks to the arrival of the new atheists, all of these important issues started receiving unflinching media attention. These past few years have been emotionally and intellectually exhilarating for skeptics of all stripes. Those of us who have maintained skeptical websites have become further energized and intellectually sharpened by reading each others’ posts and by carefully re-reading the Bible and the Koran armed with scalpels rather than intellectual queasiness. The books and media appearances of the new atheists, as well as the many websites by hundreds of newly awakened atheists, have created a community where there had previously been only isolated individuals. The work of the new atheists thus revealed to each of us that none of us was alone in scrutinizing and criticizing the supernatural claims of religions. Many energized atheists have boldly stepped out of their closets and started becoming vocal as a group, especially when believers callously asserted that all atheists are ipso facto immoral and hell-bound. [More . . .]

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