We are in big trouble

Take a guess . . . what percentage of young adults from Philadelphia would be qualified to serve in the military? 92%? 45%? Now check this out:

A nonprofit group says that up to 90 percent of young Philadelphians are ineligible for military service because of criminal records, obesity or lack of education.
So you're probably thinking that the problem is with young adults in big cities, but you're an optimist:
Nationally, the Defense Department estimates that 75 percent of young adults are disqualified from military service.
Ouch. We need boot camp for everyone. We need to put a moratorium on French fries, television and the "war on drugs."

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Jury Duty Again

Every other year, I pull jury duty. I received my latest summons with some chagrin, as it seems like I just had it. So sure was I that I had served in 2009 that I checked the box on the survey form that says I've just done the duty within the last 24 months. So I thought I might be excused. But to do this post, I checked my records. It has already been 30 months since I last spent half a week sitting in the courthouse deciding someones fate for up to $1.50/hr. Oops. They'll probably check and I'll make those big bucks yet again this July. I've sat on several juries, and been foreman a couple of times. Civil lawyers don't like me. I get bumped from all lawsuits involving measurable things, like product liability cases. But criminal attorneys don't seem to mind my rational bent. I may have to try harder. Murder trials are very stressful. Maybe an Atheist shirt or button would help. Atheists are among the most distrusted demographics in this nation. Sex offenders get more respect. How do I feel about this regular duty? Consider my official number.

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The things our biggest and most nebulous villains have in common

Jonathan Haidt's The Happiness Hypothesis is one of my favorite books of all time. It is in the top 10 books I have heavily annotated. Here's a sampling of why (although if you search for "Haidt" in the search field of this website, you will find 20 of other posts regarding Haidt's work). In the following excerpt, Haidt discusses what all of our biggest villains seem to have in common:

When the moral history of the 1990s is written, it might be titled desperately seeking Satan . With peace and harmony ascendant, Americans seemed to be searching for substitute villains. We tried drug dealers (but then the crack epidemic waned) and a child abductors (who are usually one of the parents). The cultural right vilified homosexuals; the left vilified racists and homophobes. As I thought about these various villains, including the older villains of Communism and Satan himself, I realized that most of them share three properties: they are invisible (you can't identify the evil one from appearance alone) their evil spreads by contagion, making it vital to protect impressionable young people from infection (for example from communist ideas, homosexual teachers, were stereotypes on television); and the villains can be defeated only if we all pull together as a team. It became clear to me that people want to believe they are on a mission from God, or that they are fighting for some secular good (animals, fetuses, women's rights), and you can't have much of a mission without good allies and a good enemy.
How devastingly "refreshing" that modern villains are so identifiable and that they are doing such tangible damage. We are now looking at a devastated national economy, two expensive and needless wars, a ruined ecosystem in the Gulf of Mexico, an energy crisis and a helpless political system created by an utterly dysfunctional election system that, for the most part, attracts megalomaniac ignoramuses and repels humble, good-hearted and well-informed people. It remains to be seen whether we will ever be able to let go of our bogeymen and, instead, focus on our real villains. Addendum: See this related post on "The Power of Nightmares."

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Father’s Day thoughts

I am the lucky father of two young ladies, aged 10 and 11. Though I have worked hard with my wife to raise these two girls for more than a few years, this work doesn’t qualify me as any sort of expert. I am a father like most other fathers, without any specialized training or insights regarding parenting. I think about my daughters every hour of every day, and that is no different than most other fathers. I am far too often away from home at work missing my daughters, often painfully so, but this is unfortunately typical in our culture. I want the best for my children, and in that regard, I am no different than any other father. I can’t imagine not having become a father, and that is another thought that occurs to virtually every other father. Though extolling fatherhood in writing is not something that all other fathers do, I am far from unique in this regard too. I work hard to respect the privacy of my daughters . It is not my right to freely disclose details about my relationship with either of my daughters to a large online audience. It is for this reason alone that you won’t read much about my relationships with my daughters (though here is a rare exception). I’m tempted to share thousands of joyous moments on this site, because these sorts of powerful moments happen every day. I don’t write about these private happenings, however, because it wouldn’t be fair. These privacy concerns won’t stop me from writing about fatherhood in general. Here I am, writing on “Father’s Day,” knowing full well that for all committed fathers, every day is Father’s Day. Every moment one sees one’s child beaming a smile, it is Father’s Moment. As I sit here tonight, I find myself thinking that this is an appropriate day for re-considering what it is that I’ve been trying to accomplish as a father. This sort of contemplation exercise was encouraged by the authors of a child-raising book called The Manipulative Child: How to Regain Control and Raise Resilient, Resourceful and Independent Kids, by E.W. Swihart and Patrick Cotter. These two authors encourage parents to periodically set aside the time to draft a concise statement of what it is that they are trying to accomplish as parents. We live in a scary world, and the ubiquitous dangers frame my views on parenting. I'm like most parents in that I constantly struggle to walk a fine line with my children. I want them to feel safe, but I also want to prepare them for the real world. It is in this context that I define my goal as a father something like this: When my daughters grow up to be adults, if they are still relying on me, or tending to my wants, putting me on any sort of pedestal or trying to please me, then I have failed as a father. When my daughters become adults, what I seek is a genuine friendship with each of them. In my view, a loving friendship is the sort of relationship that results between a parent and a child if the parenting has been successful. My hope is also that my daughters, once grown, will have developed the wide array of skills necessary to allow them to compete well with the global workforce, not merely the American workforce. I want them to also have the social skills (emotional intelligence) to allow them to confidently thrive both within and outside of groups. I want them to feel comfortable around many types of human beings, including those who have very few material resources. Nor do I want them to feel any obeisance when they find themselves in the company of people who have greater notoriety, power or material resources. I want them to be self-critical, such that they will want to repeatedly revisit their own most cherished presumptions (as well as those of others). And as my own mother told me, I want my daughters to be kind-hearted. Without going into any details, I am celebrating on this Father’s Day because I live with two kind-hearted, hard-working, self-critical, independent-minded daughters. There is a lot to celebrate today. My hope is that my beautiful daughters will continue their impressive journeys out into the world in order to make the world a better place, and to discover who they themselves are in the process. That is my Father’s Day hope.

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