Why didn’t I think of this? Someone has gone into the business of insuring that your pets will be cared for when the Rapture comes and your loving pets are left behind? One such company is here. For the small price of $110, a group of “dedicated animal lovers and atheists” will agree to care for your pet if you are taken to the heavens sometime within the next ten years. I assume you could renew the contract upon payment of more money if your pet is still alive and you have not been taken by Jesus. If you simply DIE, the contract does not apply. Apparently these animal lovers will only go so far. If you die, and your dog is left homeless, the dog is on its own.
I would offer that same service for $109, if anyone is interested.
It's a shame that the good pets don't get to levitate up to heaven with their good owners, which would make this important service unnecessary. I added the floating pets image to this post to remind readers that we can't rule out that pets levitate into heaven.
I'll do it for $99.99 😉
Heck, if I could get 100,000 people to sign up, I'd do it for $1 each. I'd still make a profit of $100,000!