At Quillette, Jacob Falkovich has written “The Sex Negative Society” in which he lists the many reasons we are now sex “negative.” Here is an excerpt:
Capitalism knows that sex sells, but it’s not selling you on sex. You’re sold sex appeal—the trappings that make your peers (and you) see yourself as worthy of sex. Sex worthiness is sold in many ways: luxury watches, luxury dresses, luxury degrees, luxury beliefs. People can fall into narcissistic obsession with acquiring sex worthiness that entirely precludes actual intimacy. Even if that fate is avoided, the effort spent on acquiring sex worthiness isn’t spent on connecting with intimate partners. Good sex doesn’t contribute to any brand’s sales metrics or any nation’s GDP.
Perhaps it makes no sense to expect sex-positivity of any culture at all. If culture is simply the set of stories people tell themselves to get along collectively and establish order and hierarchy, it has no room for the private and disorderly affair of sex. Camille Paglia takes this further, imagining most of Western art and philosophy as a defense against the chaotic, filthy, and daemonic nature of intercourse. Civilization was always a way to control sex, not to promote it.
There are times when I think back thirty-plus years to an episode of The Golden Girls and smile; Rose Nylund explains to her roommates that when someone first described sexual intercourse to her, she thought it was a joke.
And if humans were designed by a “God,” I would have enjoyed being part of that thought process, including potential alternate designs that did not get chosen. But at least we don’t make babies like snails.