Many of us are finding it frustrating to distance ourselves from other people during the Coronavirus pandemic and it’s not surprising. As human animals, we are wired to be social and this includes introverts like me, at least some of the time. When restraining ourselves from going out to physically spend time with others, it feels like our lives are on hold. it feels like we are doing nothing important. We love bathing in the social froth of face-to-face meetings. It doesn’t seem like we are fully human when we actively bar others from entering our physical spaces. Living in isolation sucks. Each of us is getting an extremely tiny taste of the pain that inmates feel while in solitary confinement.

As we wander around our homes, turning down tempting invitations to visit neighbors and friends and acquaintances, it might seem that we are doing nothing to actively help with the spread of the Coronavirus. It feels disempowering. We need to reframe.

We need to keep in mind that when we say “no” to these temptations to gather with others, we are not doing nothing. We are uttering a sacred no. We are exercising power each and every time we resist this temptation to physically gather together. This sacred “no” is not merely an exercise of power. Each time we say “no,” we are employing a superpower with a logarithmic extension illustrated by this data. Uttering the word “no” with unfailing consistency flattens the curve. Scroll down to find the chart in this article showing the dramatic improvement when ¾ of the population exercises social distancing. The effect is so incredibly powerful that it almost seems magical, but these numbers are based on basic biology and basic math. When we say no, we are channeling Archimedes, who once illustrated the power of levers by stating: “Give me the place to stand, and I shall move the earth.” To the extent that we work together to achieve social distancing, we are collectively moving the earth.

It can be frustrating to physically avoid the people we love, but things could have been a lot worse. At moments like these, it’s repeatedly worthwhile to appreciate the magic of the Digital Revolution. The hard work of thousands of very smart people over many decades is allowing us to stay connected in meaningful, albeit imperfect, ways.

Those who are limiting their digital communications to texts and audio should consider video connections such as Facetime and Skype. Video offers many advantages over texts and audio. See here and here. Research has shown that video conversations are much better than audio (e.g., phone calls) for avoiding depression and nurturing social connections.
Researchers examined the frequency of in-person, telephone and written social contact, including email. Then they looked at the risk of depression symptoms two years later, adjusting for potential confounding factors including health status, how close people lived from family and preexisting depression. The researchers found that having little face-to-face social contact nearly doubles your risk of having depression two years later. They also reported that having more or fewer phone conversations, or written or email contact, had no effect on depression.

So thank you Digital Revolution, for keeping us from being completely isolated in these trying times. The fact that we can stay connected should give us the social support we need to maintain physical isolation.

The world has become a shockingly small place as this pandemic progresses and each of us has unwittingly become a member of a highly integrated medical/social web. Each of us can and should embrace a phrase attributed to the Hippocratic Oath: “Do no harm.” Interestingly, that phrase does not appear in the Hippocratic Oath, but this one does: “Into whatever homes I go, I will enter them for the benefit of the sick, avoiding any voluntary act of impropriety or corruption . . .” The modern version of the Hippocratic Oath provides.

I will prevent disease whenever I can, for prevention is preferable to cure.

I will remember that I remain a member of society, with special obligations to all my fellow human beings, those sound of mind and body as well as the infirm.

Let us work together to live by these Hippocratic principles.

Repeatedly saying no to the temptation to socialize with others might seem disorienting, nonchalant, frustrating and boring, but living these principles is extremely strong medicine during this pandemic. Your frustration and boredom are small prices to pay for saving many thousands of lives. You are being a hero to the extent that you are consistently say no.

Stay safe.