What kinds of things do people stick into their orifices? It’s limited only by their imagination, it seems. This article summarizes hospital reports and it’s an eye-opener—wait, I shouldn’t have said that, because some of you might now try to stick something in your eye. The data comes from the National Electronic Injury Surveillance System.
Here’s a sample of things people stuck into their ears:
Ear:
SEED
PAINTBRUSH
“SOME BALLS”
SLAG
MAKEUP BRUSH
PATIENT TOLD PARENTS THAT THE CATS STUCK SOMETHING IN HER EAR
GASOLINE
BUTTERFLY
HERSHEY KISS
“CLASSMATE PUT A ROCK IN EAR, HAS PIECE OF PAPER IN OTHER EAR”
Check out the article for lots more.
But now I must mention that I once attended a deposition of a doctor in Atlanta. On his bookshelf, he had a big jar of screws, nails, coins, nuts and bolts and other metal things. It all weighed more than a pound. The doctor related that a man came to the ER complaining that he didn’t feel good. An x-ray revealed all of this crap in his stomach. The medical staff did surgery to take it all out. Shortly thereafter, “the man died of something else.” Go figure.
Errr, I used to work in Urology. The staff had accumulated a small pile of metal objects a patient had inserted – in fact it was all mounted on the wall and in a frame. The patient did eventually succeed in puncturing his bladder. That was the end of him.
I once saw a man eat a lightbulb at a fair. I certainly looked and sounded like a lightbulb. I’m still wondering whether it was a prop. He did it on a regular basis as part of his act.
Apparently, you CAN eat a lightbulb. http://bbliveshow.info/How_to_Eat_Freaking_Light_Bulbs!