I don’t know anything about bodybuilding, or I didn’t until I watched Raising the Bar 2, a brand-new documentary by Mike Pulcinella (Mike wrote it, shot and edited it). Mike often submits comments to this site, and we have corresponded by e-mail a number of times. A couple weeks ago, Mike asked me whether I’d be interested in watching his new documentary, and I jumped at the chance. Based upon Mike’s many comments to this site, I know him to be a thoughtful guy. I knew that he must’ve found something worthy of his time in this freakish-seeming endeavor of “bodybuilding.”
In this documentary, Mike follows his brother Dave Pulcinella (and Dave’s significant other, Jenn Emig) as Dave trains for and competes in high-level bodybuilding competitions. Before you jump to the conclusion that this is just some guy following his brother around with the camera, take a look at the trailer for “Raising the Bar 2,” available at Mike’s site. As you will see, Mike is a skilled filmmaker and storyteller and he is careful to make sure that this story retains real-life texture. Mike’s edits are crisp and the soundtrack works well. As for the storytelling, this kind of video could only have been accomplished by a filmmaker who had gained the complete trust of the participants. In sum, this documentary is not always a glowing endorsement of Dave.
The documentary was compelling on several levels. First of all, viewers will have an opportunity to see what is really like to compete in the sport of bodybuilding. Full disclosure: before I saw this film, I thought that this sport was freakish. I still think the sport is freakish, although I have now been reminded that the participants are real human beings and they are not physically or emotionally homogenous.
The sport ostensibly involves bodies, of course, bodies as machines, but as Dave Pulcinella comments, “It’s always a mind game.” How could it not be? After all, while the competitors are working up to the actual competitions, they must repeatedly force-feed themselves enormous amounts of food–Dave jams down 18 chicken breasts each day, to go with apparently endless numbers of eggs. Simply hauling home the food from the grocery store would seem sufficient to build up muscles.
So why do these people participate in the sport? Maybe the answer can be found in a joke often told by bodybuilders:
Q: How many bodybuilders does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Three. One to screw it in and two to say “Dude, you’re huge!”
The documentary moves us toward Dave’s participation in the Masters National Competition in Pittsburgh. As you can imagine, there are ups and downs along the way. Simply watching the workouts is exhausting. What was surprising to me is that sculpting one’s body in such extreme ways requires a tremendous amount of planning and discipline. It’s not like you can just go to the gym a few times a week. These guys are really going at it with numerous specialized training techniques, apparently building up their bulk all waking hours. And when they are not actually working out or jamming food in their mouths, they’re fretting about how they will best get those surreal mounds of muscle to pop out of their frames, laced with barely subcutaneous blood vessels, glistening for the cameras and judges. There are many types of bodybuilders, old and young, thoughtful and single-minded, male and female (just when you thought you’d seen it all, you are presented with the a peek at the grotesque physique of veteran female bodybuilder, Debbie Bramwell).
There are dozens of techniques for getting those judges to like your physique, and you’ll see that each bodybuilder has his or her own spin on the best way to get the job done. They spend a lot of time on the right amount of hydration and they spend long hours considering how to peak for the competitions without bringing on cramps or worse (as the documentary demonstrates, high-level bodybuilding can be extremely dangerous).
I won’t spoil the ending of this documentary, because I really found this video to be compelling viewing up to the end. I will say, however, that for 80% of the video, the voice in my head kept asking “Why? Why? Why do they do this to themselves?. There are hints throughout. As Dave told another competitor (Lance) he was helping to train: “You still look like a human being and that’s not going to work.” And all that obsessive grueling work can’t really be about those relatively tiny trophies that only some of these hulking mammoths get to carry around, if successful.
Mike really pushes this “Why?” point with his interviews of his sister (and Dave’s sister) Christine. She weighs in at length at the extended family table, surrounded by tiny Pucinellas, where it is clear that the novelty of “Uncle Dave’s” bodybuilding has long worn off. She looks straight into the camera and talks in a way that lets you know that she’s repeatedly considered and rejected Uncle Dave’s hopes and dreams. “He’s taking nutrition and health and distorted and abused them. … They are probably the most unhealthy people around…. It’s like he’s walking around in a costume.”
Mike makes it clear that this is a sport with winners and losers, where even the winners are often losers given the incredible amount of time and energy they must pour into this profession. Understandably, Mike doesn’t directly address the issue of steroids, even though this topic occurred to me whenever the characters experienced emotional flare-ups.
It is clear that, for Dave, bodybuilding was not just a big part of his world, but it became his entire world. The film is a reminder that humans are equipped with potent imaginations that give them the ability to turn themselves into big heroes within a tiny subset of human activity. The video reinforces that we are capable of turning things that are surprisingly un-compelling to most people into the only thing for ourselves. Human beings are capable of converting intensely mundane activities into sacred undertakings.
By the time I got to the end of the video, all those heaping mounds of living muscle looked a little less freakish than they did at the beginning. This is a sad story in many ways, though a revealing one and a thoughtful one.
Thanks to Mike for bringing his work to my attention.
"The video reinforces that we are capable of turning things that are surprisingly un-compelling to most people into the only thing for ourselves. We are capable of converting intensely mundane activities into sacred undertakings."
As I read Erich's post, I was gearing up to comment about bodybuilding, but then I read the above two lines and my perspective changed. Those two lines made me think about evangelical Christians, and George Bush with his so-called "war on terror." I'm sure we could think of many other examples of people who have converted what should be relatively mundane activities into seemingly sacred undertakings. Indeed, why do so many people become obsessed with themselves…er, I mean, with their work?
As regards bodybuilders…they're not really that different from people who specialize in other fields. As in science, medicine, law, or other sports, the people who are really good at it have a combination of genetic advantage, hard work and ambition. Just as lawyers spend hours honing their arguments, bodybuilders spend hours honing their muscles — the motivation is the same, the only difference is the subject matter. Are bodybuilders freaks? Well, are medical students who work 36-hour shifts during their residencies freaks? What about military special forces troops who undergo all sorts of extreme training? What about ultramarathon runners who compete in 100-mile races? What about scientists who spend seven days a week in their labs looking for the next breakthrough? All of these people train hard for the opportunity to do such things to themselves, so where should we draw the line between "freak" and someone who is simply dedicated to exploring (and exploiting) their particular natural gifts? Football players bulk up to 300+ pounds, gymnasts push the limits of balance and flexibility, boxers and jockies starve themselves, college students pull all-nighters, mountain climbers enter "the death zone," astronauts lose both muscle mass and bone density…the list goes on. Who is a freak and who is not?
Grumpy: There are, indeed, parallels between engaging in bodybuilding at a high level and engaging in other endeavors, such as medicine, art, and law. There are some differences that make bodybuilding especially intriguing, however.
1. When you engage in other professions, you can, to some extent, get away from it, at least for an hour here and there. With bodybuilding, you create an intense food furnace, your own body. As Mike's documentary makes clear, you just CAN'T turn it off. It is all-consuming, 24/7.
2. With many other professions/avocations, the rewards include money, the ability to pay your bills and those of your family. As you can see from Mike's documentary, brother Dave has built himself into an enormous hulk at what must be considerable expense. The food bill, the supplements and the training costs are not cheap. The net result is money out, not money in, except for the very few people who make pro.
3. The training time is all-consuming . As the documentary made clear, there is very little possibility for serious bodybuilders to attend to having and supporting familes. While they are training for competitions, there is almost no time for anything else and their minds are so bent on the competition and training that there is no time of ability to think of anything else.
4. Bodybuilding is physically painful, often excruciatingly so.
5. I couldn't help but consider the Darwinian angle. Those big muscles cry out "superstimulus!" It's not that other professions aren't engaging in Darwinian displays (see http://dangerousintersection.org/?p=1027), but not much compares with bodybuilding for being directly personal & physical. Most other athletes work hard to allow their bodies to engage displays that involve the use of the body to perform a task –catching touchdowns or running quick marathons, rather than puffing up all those muscles and saying "Look at me!"
I was thinking of fundamentalist thinking when I wrote the line you quoted. That aspect of the documentary was the most fascinating part for me. As an outsider, I felt a tiny bit of admiration and lots of sadness as I watched the video.
As Dave's (and Mike's) sister Christine said in the video: "In the end, who's going to remember you, and for what?" But for Dave, bodybuilding became his entire world in a self-absorbed way. Not that Dave was turned into a big blob of only muscle. He is a thoughtful fellow who, at some level, at most times, knew what he was giving up. As Dave competed with the other guys trying to turn pro, however, it was impossible to get the job done half-time. In the end, he gave up almost everything else in his life (some would say "everything"), and the sport was elevated to the level of the sacred.
It's really hard for an outsider like me to comprehend how the trophies (and the intangibles represented by the trophies) made it all worthwhile, though the video did a good job of helping me to understand.
Bodybuilding seems pretty far from the Greco-Roman ideal of a "healthy mind in a healthy body." It seems more akin to extreme body modification cults like foot-binding, tight-laced corsets (which is apparently experiencing a renaissance in the San Francisco S&M scene) and tattooing.
Here in Santa Cruz, I frequently pass on my daily pedestrian rounds an employee of a local tattoo emporium who is so heavily tattoed in the classic South Seas monochrome style, such that his pinkish-white skin forms the pattern against the dark blue ground of his tattooed skin. The other day, I stood in line at the supermarket with a man whose shaved head revealed prosthetically-implanted bumps on his cranium which were obviously meant to look like horn buds. I wonder what medical/surgical enhancements will be the next fashion trend?
Also, I can't help remembering the words of my very wise midwife, who claimed that all male ordeals and initiations were pale imitations of the female transition from maidenhood to motherhood…
Further to Erich's comment, and acknowledging that I've seen only the trailer to the film, I want to comment on the points Erich mentioned:
1) People can become obsessed with almost any occupation, not because the occupation causes obsession, but because some people have obsessive or insecure personalities. Maybe bodybuilding tends to attract such people. Certainly, the endorphin hit that comes from extreme exercise has snared more than a few people. In any case, obsession with a hobby or career is certainly not limited to bodybuilding. Visit Wall Street sometime and talk with an investment banker — many of them work 80-100 hours per week. Or, talk to any young lawyer in Manhattan trying to make partner in a big firm.
2) Unhealthy obsessions should not become socially acceptable merely because they pay well. Plenty of doctors, lawyers and other professionals work themselves to early graves, from causes that include poor nutrition, lack of exercise, and even suicide (see, e.g., http://dangerousintersection.org/?p=1259).
3) Plenty of doctors, lawyers and other professionals find insufficient time for family and friends. Plenty work themselves into divorce court.
4) I know several retired professionals whose backs are permanently hunched over because they spent so much time bent over their patients, their legal briefs, their lab benches, etc. Likewise, athletes of all sorts deal with physical pain. Joe Namath, for example, was famous for his bad knees. Some wonder if Muhammad Ali's mental impairment is the result of all those hits to the head. At the pro level, pain often comes with the territory.
5) For a fine example of Darwinian display, simply scan the parking lot of any hospital or law office. Academics hang their credentials on their walls, engineers try to impress each other with the speed of their computers or their knowledge of arcane technical details.
My point is that bodybuilding is just one of many ways in which people can spend what most of us would consider unhealthy amounts of time and money. Do we know if this documentary truly represents top bodybuilders, or is it simply picking those who lack the natural talent to perform at the pro level? Perhaps the reason some participants become obsessed is because they lack sufficient natural talent, so they try to force their bodies to do things for which it is not adequately built. This causes injuries in many sports, not just bodybuilding.
Thank you, Erich, for taking the time to watch my documentary and post about it. Most of those who have viewed it have been within the BB (bodybuilding) community and, though they've had insightful things to say about it, your outsider's perspective is, in a way, more interesting to my brother and me.
Thanks also for mentioning the music. Please allow me to plug my new friend, and the composer of most of the music you hear on RTB2, Martin Bailey. I believe he will soon be a well-known soundtrack composer…and I will soon be unable to afford him!
http://www.myspace.com/powerescape
Erich and grumpy both make some excellent points in their comments. They have understood what I was trying to show, that is a big relief to me, but I would like to make a few additional points…
There really is no such thing as "Roid rage", in my experience. "An a-hole is an a-hole", BBs say and many people will use the fact that they are taking steroids to excuse themselves to be as rude and obnoxious as they always wanted to be. The negative effects of steroids have been overhyped by a media frantic for controversy. For a more balanced view, see this expose which got little or no attention because it did not fit into the commonly held perception of steroids.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z0LEj8IPHGU
Thank you grumpy for pointing out that many other sports and professions require a similar commitment of time and energy but I have to agree with Erich and say that there are many fundamental differences between bb and those professions/sports you mentioned.
I don't feel that bb is a sport, exactly. It is more of an art form where the raw material is one's own body and genetics, and the tools are knowledge of nutrition, chemistry, training and presenting the finished product. There is nothing quite like it and the claims of narcisscism that BBs endure are often unfounded. Would you say an artist who hangs an oil painting in a gallery is saying "Look at me…look at me!"? Well, you might, because in a sense she is, just as I have said "look at me" by making a documentary and you all here have said "look at me" in your writings.
As for the "why" of it all…I don't know either. In a way RTB1 & 2 are my attempts to understand this strange passion that my brother has devoted his life to. As I have said many times in my posts here, (and as I do when researching a documentary) when discussing any strongly held belief we must look to the NEED of the person. Why would someone NEED to believe in god…or need NOT to believe? Similarly, the extremes of BB must fill a need. What exactly is the seed of need in each BB is a mystery, probably even to themselves.
Thanks,
Mike Pulcinella
gatomjp
For a larger version of the trailer see…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r-tRhKKoIFQ
For a sample clip…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5q2rd0dBc1Q
Mike, where can you see the whole documentary?
projektleiterin: The copy I sent to Erich was an advance reviewer's copy. I am in the process of getting it duplicated for sale and will let you all know when and where it is available. Thanks for your interest.
grumpy, my brother loves you for comparing what he does to being a doctor or a lawyer!
Your points are well made. BB does tend to draw in the insecure. I make that point in the doc when I show my brother as a child. He was small and frail and aways being picked on by the bigger kids. I know that had a lot to do with creating this obsession. The endorphin hit is an addictive high but so is the feeling of "bigness", of power, and the attention it brings. Dave's body is a conversation starter wherever he goes and I know that he thrives on it, adding to his obsession.
Obsession comes in many forms. Most of them are not as obvious and don't have a visible side-effect like big muscles. Obsession of any kind can be unhealthy but as Dave has said to me, "…it's the only way to WIN." If one wants to rise above mediocrity and really excel, and I mean really be the BEST at anything…sport, art, music, medicine, law or business…isn't obsession a necessity?
Ok, thanks, Mike!
I have not seen the documentary, but as I have done weightlifting as my primary form of exercise for over two decades, I wanted to make a comment. Before joining a gym, I saw most bodybuilders as obsessives with distorted aesthetics. When you actually DO a thing, you become acquainted with the personal arcana of interest, and even your aesthetics change. I have never worked up to competition condition, nor would I care to. You must bear in mind that those who compete are few compared with all those who do this in order to lose a few pounds and–more importantly–rearrange what they have.
I weight lift because I have a low tolerance for heat and subsequently a low endurance level, so I can't run (I can walk most 18-year-olds into the dirt, though). I can;t swim, so that's out. I was involved with martial arts for some years, but frankly that can become painful. I turned to body building as a sort of last resort.
Most people could do with a little. I stress a little. You can take anything to an extreme, but in moderation…well, one must spend a day at a co-ed gym and check out the wide range of very healthy body types to see what I mean.
As for the "sport" itself–I have the same attitude toward it as any other sport. I don't care for it. But having done weight training, I appreciate it.
Further to Jason's comments: I don't want to give the impression that I am condemning the BB lifesyle with RTB2. Taken in moderation, it's a very healthful way to live. Several, healthy, low-fat meals spaced throughout the day, lots of cardio, free-weight exercise and plenty of sleep are necessary components of a happy and healthy life, IMO. RTB2 shows what can happen when something good is done to excess.
Indeed, what has been called "body building" above is known by most people simply as strength training, though it is unclear where strength training leaves off and "body building" begins. In any case, strength training — also called resistance exercise or weight training — is an important component of any healthy lifestyle. It is even valuable for geriatric adults, as you will see if you visit any nursing home and see them exercising with elastic bands. Strength training builds and tones muscles, which has many health benefits, including weight loss (bigger muscles burn more calories, even at rest), injury prevention (stronger muscles help support joints), flexibility (assuming you stretch before and after workouts) and stress reduction. Strength training in combination with cardio work (to strengthen the heart muscle) should be a regular part of everyone's weekly routine: it would cut the obesity rate and reduce healthcare costs for everyone, to say nothing of the individual health benefits. As Jason and gatomjp both point out, only a tiny minority of people go to the extreme of body building, so don't let the excuse of "it's just for fitness freaks" keep you from having a gym membership.
I recommend "Pumping Iron" with Governor Schwartzenegger too! A good documentary, candid, and actually pretty inspiring. Any body (builder) can learn from Arnold, what to do, and probably a few things NOT to do!
Ben: Pumping Iron is a great movie. Fascinating, compelling and an inspiration to me for sure, but beware, PI is a "docu-drama" not a documentary. Most of the behind-the-scenes intrigue, the personas of the competitors and even much of the shocking content of Arnold's interviews were manufactured to intensify the drama. That doesn't take away from the quality of the movie for me, but as someone who strives for reality in my work, I feel it important to point out that it is not a strict documentary, though it feels like one.
On the 25th anniversary edition DVD of PI, Gov. Schwartzenegger reveals in a new interview that he was creating a character for the camera and that the truth had little to do with his desire to be a star. His charisma is still so powerful that he somehow makes the fact that he was lying to us endearing! Now THAT'S a politician for ya!
grumpy wrote: "…it is unclear where strength training leaves off and “body building” begins."
It's when one begins to neglect health in favor of a certain kind of look.
I have yet to meet somebody who isn't a freak, in some aspect or other. Kind of defeats the definition of the word freak though. I think that anybody who truly isn't a freak in any way, is probably more of a freak/anomaly, based on how rare being un-freakish is. Reminds me of when I was a kid, and was worried about if I was "normal", being a late-bloomer, and short to begin with. They showed a movie in sex-education class which told us that we are ALL indeed "normal". Being a "normal" human, implies being unique, at least in some ways. Of course, it didn't help me much at the time, as some of the boys already had deep-man voices and even the girls were growing TALLER (and curvy).
Thanks Gato. Pretty neat to see the face behind the name. Someday you may see my name/face in lights too, or on the wall at the post office! I do want to watch the documentary of yours, and hope it changes the world (if that's what you want!) or at least provides some quality entertainment.
I just caught a portion of "HORNS and HALOS" on the documentary channel (about GWB). Here is a summary… if you are interested.
http://www.hornsandhalos.com/story.html http://www.villagevoice.com/film/0310,sinagra2,42…
The story is absolutely fascinating, and the documentary itself is well done, in my opinion. In another life I was in a television production class, and I have a friend who is in the business (or at least trying).
Consider this is my official challenge to your brother for an arm wrestling match. NOT!
Thanks Ben. I'm always on the lookout for interesting docs and that looks like a good one!
The topic of why bodybuilders do what they do is much less interesting to me then the reaction of family and friends to the behavior patterns of these athletes and eventually the life long metamorphosis that ensues. As a consequence of training with Dave for nearly twenty years I have experienced these negative reactions from my own family and some friends in large part because of behaviors I have emulated from observing Dave; and without question, because of the physique I have acquired through the techniques learned and practiced with him in the gym. In light of my own direct experience with Dave and bodybuilding 'Raising The Bar II' truly struck a chord with me. As a result of viewing this documentary, I was reminded of many a holiday and cookout with family members that just did not understand the sport of bodybuilding. My family's inability to comprehend what I was trying to accomplish and failure to appreciate the sacrifices involved in my endeavor would often lead to unintentional insult keeping me away from many family get togethers.
The adverse family reactions I speak of are most overt in RTB2 when Mike interviews Dave's and his sister Christine; whom I have always had an affinity for. Chrissies' most attractive trait to me is not her angelic face nor her sensuous body but her candor both in RTB2 and in my own interactions with her over the years. Michael's mastery behind the camera is evident through out the documentary but especially so during this sequence. His smooth comforting narratives really do envelop the subjects in front of the camera with a sense of calming trust and are conducive to behaviors that are most natural. The video footage of Chrissie captured by Michael is powerful, convincing and compels the viewers to believe that she believes what she is saying and, in point of fact, she does.
Christine's candor simply carves through any pretense of protocol when she exclaims, "He's taking nutrition and health and distorted and abused them… They are probably the most unhealthy people around… it's like he's walking around in a costume". These statements are the most revealing evidence in my mind of both her myopic and ironic perspective. Her viewpoint however, is a valid one, but where Dave's life and choices are concerned she is gazing at the stars through a microscope.
Dave never was concerned with being healthy as Christine eludes too. He started lifting weights to increase his musculature in the hope that it would to keep him from getting beat up. This is what led Dave to bodybuilding not an interest in health or nutrition. When Christine likens her brother's physique to a costume I was both amazed and slightly offended. He is simply doing what is necessary to make his body fit the image that he wants it to; in other words, Dave is simply taking a common human desire and going in an esoteric direction with it but not an evil one. Christine's former world of modeling is saturated with façades; one could even use the word costume to describe the metamorphic transformations made. High heels? She's not that tall. Lipstick? Your lips aren’t that full. Push up bras? Her breasts aren’t that big. Anorexia your not supposed to be that skinny and so on.
Christine has moved on from all of that now and although I never see her God given beauty fading, which always leaves modeling an open option; she is a mother and a wife now. Her choices to take on these two roles are both marvelous and noble. I just fail to understand why she projects her family centered passions, hopes and dreams on her brother instead of accepting the passions, hopes and dreams that already exist within him.
The absence of any empathy and the overall lack of acceptance I have discussed hitherto this point are brought to the forefront when she rhetorically asks, "who is going to remember you, and for what?" It is at this point that I feel as though she considers Dave to be some how below her as a direct result of her choice to have a family and his choice not to; her words seemingly searing with disdain at Dave's life choices. The scene is especially powerful since it is filmed in the midst of a family event, a birthday party I believe, where there is abundant food and drink that Dave could never consume while preparing for competition. Even though Christine's question by definition is not supposed to be answered I shall do so any way.
In response to her question one could argue that Dave's clients will remember him because his knowledge has changed and will continue change their lives for the better. Dave's friends will remember him for his quick wit, endless humor and innate kindness. It is Dave's kindness and gentle demeanor that has impressed me more then any of his other qualities in the two plus decades that I have had the pleasure to know him. It is an infectious kindness and I am pleased to say that, as if by diffusion, his kindness has been imparted upon myself. As a result I will never forget him nor could I ever thank him enough. Most important of all, however, the people who should cherish and appreciate Dave's characteristics and accomplishments both in the world of bodybuilding and otherwise are his family. Here in lies the primary flaw in Christine's views regarding her brother and his choices. She has some how forgotten that Dave is her brother and that means family. This of course is the strangest irony of all since Christine at her core is a wife and a mother. Would she ever want to see her children dismiss each other in the same way she dismisses Dave and his chosen path?
Christine believes that Dave does not care about family events and implies that he is indifferent to his family. In deed, Christine is so frustrated by this perception that she rejects Dave's life style, hopes and dreams; in effect negating his very essence in her own mind. She states that he "is never there" but to what extent does she make these family visits plausible or even possible for Dave? She buys wine for the guests but is there spring water for Dave? There is cake for the kids, is there chicken breasts for Dave? How about the timing of these events? Has a family party or get together ever been planned around Dave's competitions? Has Dave's family ever planned a get together or party simply because he has a week off after a contest and can exist like anyone else not only showing at the family gathering but enjoying his family and his sister with a glass of wine and a piece of cake?
In closing, it is safe to say that the genesis of Christine's criticism concerning Dave is an underlying sadness turned to anger because she misses her brother and more importantly she wants her children to know their Uncle. I for one hope this happens and when it does I also hope there is enough wine and cake for everyone.
"to increase his musculature in the hope that it would to keep him from getting beat up"
Sorry to cherry pick, I much enjoyed reading Tim's viewpoint, but this one comment stood out to me. Just seemed a bit of a simplification or excuse, I mean, do people really "get beat up" these days? Maybe Dave had a *tiny* chip on his shoulder too, or was he just used to hanging out with an rough crowd? I can't remember being beaten up once, picked on sure, everyone has. I guess we all chose our battles. What I most notice about guys with big physiques is that they are usually mild mannered, and responsible, and are not the kind of people who get into brawls. I really must see this documentary NOW!
He definitely got beat up. We come from a rough, working-class neighborhood in Southwest Philadelphia. David was very small and very meek and was a target for bullies.
You are right, many big guys are mild-mannered and Dave is one of them. Very often that bulk is put on as a defense. That was definitely the case with Dave. Of course when his physique began to attract the opposite sex as well as repel the bullies, I'm sure that was also an incentive to continue to lift weights!
Hi Ben,
All I can say to you is that you probably did not grow up in Southwest Philly in the 1960's and '70s. I am one of the most copacetic people I know and was in many fights as a young kid (between 6-18) that I did not want, or ask for. That part of town was a rough lower middle class "neighborhood" where your place in the pecking order was constantly being challenged. I am not promoting that attitude, just explaining the facts. I grew up about a mile or so from Dave and his brother (Mike is my best friend) and that was the reality we lived with.
Thank God that it was just fists (and once in a while a knife or a rock) and not the guns used so often today.
Hey Tim,
Great rant brother! Dead on.
I would only add to your points a little bit. The crux of the matter with Chrissie and Dave to me is compromise. Most ordinary and balanced people compromise all of the time. It is what gets us through life on most days. However, champions can't compromise.
Whether or not you are a champion bodybuilder, baseball player, scientist, musician, businessman or artist your existence must revolve around your avocation. You can't excel in any other way. Mediocrity is the result of compromise in a competition.
When push came to shove Chrissie chose family over competition whatever her reasons were. I believe that Chrissie has difficulty (understandable) dealing with Dave's championship level obsession with bodybuilding. She would have the same complaint if Dave were a Donald Trump or a Jimi Hendrix. I am sure that working on deals 20 hours a day and doing dope to contain your creative demons aren't physically healthy either. I would bet my house that both "The Donald" and Jimi have missed a lot of family clambakes in their time.
People like Chrissie and I will never really understand the choices Dave has made and I would not be surprised if Dave wouldn't say the same to us. We come from such different places in some ways that at best we can only sympathize with each other on some points.
The question I think that Chrissie has to ask herself is this; Would you want Dave to be unhappy living as an average Joe when he has the fire to be a champion? The downfall of Chrissie's position (and mine) is that we assume that Dave would be just as happy or happier with a pot belly, three kids and a place at the picnic table. While that does satisfy us to a great extent, it would not satisfy a lion like Dave. Now I have just spun that picture positively for Dave. Many others wouldn't. They might give negative pyschological scenarios for Dave, or call him a narcissist. It all comes down to a subjective point of view.
Life is short. If we love one another we must let our family and friends go where they will and live life as they deem fit. I, for one would not want to be responsible for someone else's happiness based on making them follow my formula for a happy life. I also would not want that imposed upon me. I may disagree with Dave's lifestyle for myself, but that doesn't stop me from loving and respecting him as a champion and a friend.
I keep thinking of high-level body-building as a biological version of driving a Hummer.