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Douglas Adams' Hilarious Take on Australia: A Survival Guide

Douglas Adams’ guide to Australia

As (to the best of my knowledge - please correct me if I'm wrong) I'm the only Aussie here, I thought I'd give you a quick primer on the land of my birth. But not by my own hand. I'd just bugger it up. Douglas Adams, writer of the five-part and inaccurately-named Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy Trilogy, seemed to equally adore and fear this wide brown land and penned the following survival guide to Australia, pre-dating Lonely Planet by many years and being a lot more accurate with the information he provided. Except for the bit about snakes: Australia is crawling with the bastards. Of the top dozen deadly snake species on this planet, we have more or less all of them. But I can forgive Douglas a small error. After all, it's impolite to call attention to the grievous errors of a deceased person. Unless they're named Hitler. [Photo: Douglas Adams signing books (2000). (from Wikimedia Commons)] Anyway, without further ado, I present: ------------- DOUGLAS ADAMS' GUIDE TO AUSTRALIA Australia is a very confusing place, taking up a large amount of the Bottom half of the planet. It is recognisable from orbit because of many unusual features, including what at first looks like an enormous bite taken out of its southern edge; a wall of sheer cliffs which plunge deep into the girting sea. Geologists assure us that this is simply an accident of geomorphology and plate tectonics, but they still call it the "Great Australian Bight" proving that not only are they covering up a more frightening theory, but they can't spell either. The first of the confusing things about Australia is the status of the place. Where other land masses and sovereign lands are classified as either continent, island, or country, Australia is considered all three. Typically, it is unique in this . . .

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Good news from Down Here – equality one step closer

In the aftermath of California’s passing of the shameful Proposition 8, I bring good tidings (and hope) from Australia. I’ll post most of the article From the Canberra Times because it’s short and to the point:

Gay and lesbian couples are a step closer to equality before the law after two Bills passed through the Senate.

The laws would extend the definition of a de facto relationship to include same-sex couples and allow homosexuals to leave superannuation entitlements to partners.

The Bills also guarantee equality in tax, social security, health, aged care and employment.

Labor senator Penny Wong, who is openly gay, said the laws would deliver the sort of equality before the law that same-sex couples have never experienced.

”They [the Bills] deliver on a very important election commitment on an important day for us,” she told the Senate.

Uniting Care Australia’s national director Lin Hatfield Dodds applauded the Bills, saying it was ”about time” they were passed.

”These Bills are about citizens having equality before the law,” she said. ”They should cut across party lines, because it’s about respecting the inherent dignity of each person, and ensuring under the law there is opportunity for each person to express their sex and not be penalised for that.”

Liberal senator George Brandis said it was a historic day that signified an end to law reforms more than 40 years in the making.

Australian Greens leader Bob Brown, also openly gay and a long-time campaigner for same-sex rights, congratulated the Government

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