The Onion has just broken another big story:
The U.S. economy ceased to function this week after unexpected existential remarks by Federal Reserve chairman Ben Bernanke shocked Americans into realizing that money is, in fact, just a meaningless and intangible social construct.
Controversial new law bans marriages except between people who actually love each other:
New Law Would Ban Marriages Between People Who Don't Love Each Other
This may actually be more about problems in cross cultural communication. But it does appear to be a case of runaway Nanny-State-ism. I have come to accept with a chuckle the warning labels on toasters and VCR's to not use them in the bath or shower. I'm sure they are slippery when wet, and one might drop them on ones foot. This is a problem among electrocuted zombies, I'm sure.
But what am I to make of the warning on this product?
I need ANSI-Approved eye protection to open a drawer? Did an actual lawyer sign off on this?
This box is actually lower quality than a similar one that I'd bought at Target a couple of years earlier for the same price. Target doesn't have them any more, so I resort to Harbor Freight.
I've been mail-ordering from Harbor Freight since the 1980's, long before they had stores east of California. This is a cheap tools import house that now has an outlet a few blocks west of Crestwood Plaza Court. The prices are amazing, but you get what you pay for.
Slate has a proposal for making television golf more interesting: Add basketball announcers to the broadcast booth.
According to The Onion, an American bald eagle has spoken out, frustrated that so many people assume that he is pro-war.
Frustrated by the widely held assumption that he unequivocally endorses the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq, a bald eagle said Monday that his thoughts on the conflicts were far more nuanced than many Americans might expect. Speaking to reporters from his nest in the upper branches of a 175-foot ponderosa pine tree, the eagle explained that each member of his species was different and none should be taken for granted as a lockstep supporter of American military policy.